Our Unlikely Package

We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose

Romans 8:28

About 7 years ago my college daughter announced she was pregnant. The flood of emotions ranged from anger to disappointment, from embarrassment back to disappointment, around and around the emotions churned in my head and heart.  She had always been an A student.  She did well in school, she was smart, and had never been in trouble.  She graduated from high school a year early and immediately started taking college classes. It was then she started down a path of her own that was wider and wilder than I could ever admit out loud.  In fact, I tried my best to pretend some of the teenage things she was doing were not really happening. Unfortunately, her path seemed to be the path of the majority. Something I could not fathom. As a parent I felt defeated by the darts of life.

My teenage life was so different, in ways I fought for my life. I had to grow up early.  I had to become responsible or I would have been living on the streets. I had to go to work as soon as I was old enough and have worked every day since.  I didn't 'party' as a teen. Peer pressure was never my friend, in fact, I was somewhat of a loner. I wasn't a popular kid in school and that was okay.  I was always driven by a purpose and that purpose was to make something out of myself and my life; to be the best I could be regardless of the circumstances that had been laid out for me.  I knew God, but I did not have a relationship with Him. I couldn't tell you that He was at the center of my life - but there was a prevailing force that continuously pushed me forward and so I trudged day by day, month by month, year by year forward. It was far from easy. In fact, so many times I wanted to give up and felt so alone but then I'd feel the tug and step by step I would keep moving forward. I didn't have time or money to waste divulging in the alcohol and other recreational vices others were participating in.  I did make some bad choices looking for love in all the wrong places and for this I'm not proud.  In my quest to become the person I wanted to become I also wanted a family - the family that I did not have.  This led to seeking relationships and eventually a very early marriage that brought me this precious daughter that I get to write about today.  Was I really so different than my daughter?  Did I have the right to be angry? Disappointed? Emotions were rampant.  Satan was having a field day and I didn't even know it.

My daughter was working for a law firm and going to college.  She was in a relationship with the baby's father and was now setting up her own house.  The advice I gave her may sound startling to some - but she did not have to get married.  And she didn't, not for 2 years.  

I couldn't get excited about this baby on the way.  I went to doctor's appointments with her, experienced ultrasounds, bought lots of sweet baby things, but the thought of her life changing with a new baby at such a young age destroyed any possibility of me being happy or excited, much less ecstatic.  I didn't feel it.  I went through the motions, went down the path; for nine long months I tried to build some excitement. The joy never came.

My husband was not even 40. I was only 42 when a little boy came into the world that January. He stole  my heart immediately. The joy came.

From the day he was born he became the love of my life. When things were tough and I was down,

Our 1st Grandson - Trey

all I had to do was pick up that sweet baby boy - that innocent little guy that knew nothing about the circumstances of life - and the heartaches of those days were washed away.  Complete and utter joy.

'Some of God's greatest gifts are wrapped in unlikely Packages'                   (taken from study)

I allowed circumstances to steal 9 months of my life. I burned 9 months wishing I could be happy, struggling with feelings of guilt because I wasn't.  I tormented myself internally during this pregnancy thinking only about the negative.  She wasn't married (yet I was happy she wasn't getting married), she had school to finish and a degree to get, I didn't know much about "dad" but she didn't meet him working in her law firm or in church!  He couldn't be good enough for her.  In fact, he was totally opposite from what I wanted for my daughter.  She was doing everything backwards. She wasn't doing anything the right way.  (or the way I thought she was supposed to.  This wasn't in MY  plans!) And I dwelt on these things day after day after day. What a complete and utter waste of God given days.

In my bible study book, 'What Happens When Women Say Yes to God" by Lysa TerKeurst, Lysa says this:  ".......God will work in and through every situation to bring good from it. ....God has a purpose and His plans to accomplish that purpose are perfect.  Trusting God's purpose, and seeking to understand that He takes all the events from our life and orchestrates good from them, leads to a changed perspective'

Only now that I have a relationship with God can I look back at this situation and see how God used this situation to bring good from it.  How our joy came in a very 'unlikely package'.   God took a situation that to me at the time was a nightmare and turned it around to bring joy into a place that needed joy.  My life's perspectives changed. Among the joy he brings to our family, he continues to teach me every day about unconditional love, along with his little sister.

I am sad today because I have a brand new grandson that I have not yet met. My son fathers a baby that is 5 months old. Due to the choices of this baby's mother, our family is unable to spend time with him.  I have not yet held this precious, sweet boy but have no doubt in my mind that God will take this situation and use it to bring good from it. I have no doubt that He is working this out so that this sweet boy will have the love of not only his mother's family but of his father and his father's family as well.
 

God's newest creation.

 Today I praise God for these 'Unlikely Packages'.  Today I have faith in a God of restoration and healing. Today I can stand here thinking about this new grandson knowing that it won't be long before our lives will be blessed as a result of the works of our Father, who 'takes all the events from our life and orchestrates good from them, leading us to a changed perspective'. 

Take some time today and think about an 'unlikely package'  in your life.  My life has been full of them; however, today I stand in awe as I think about how each was used.  God is Good all the time!

Trey

Kylie

Father, today I pray for each reader, for the circumstances or unlikely packages in their lives.  Father may they be comforted knowing that if they will have faith and believe in you, that according to your purposes, each will be used in their lives to bring them closer to you and to provide a 'changed perspective'.  I pray that we will face each day with joy in you and not waste  precious time in negative thinking or brash attitudes. I love you Father and am so thankful that today I stand at your feet with complete peace in all things. Amen.         
In God's Holy Light,
<3 Kelley                          

                                  

                 

#AMAZED - Being the Bride

'God is using all of your experiences, both good and bad, to develop your character to match your calling' Lysa TerKeurst

The picture above was taken on a drive into my office in Scottsdale, AZ.  #AMAZED by the power of His ability.

 
Not a day goes by that I am not amazed by the power of God.  I went through many years of my life not truly seeing the greatness of the one who gave me life and created me, uniquely, in his likeness. Yes, I believed; however, never truly saw the vast power and total control He exercised over my life. For better or worse - for richer or poorer.  I was the bride and He the groom.

With eloquence Job describes the greatness of our Savior to Bildad; understanding what is difficult for the layman.  

God stretches the northern sky over empty space and hangs the earth on nothing. 
He wraps the rain in his thick clouds, and the clouds don’t burst with the weight.
He covers the face of the moon, shrouding it with his clouds.
He created the horizon when he separated the waters; he set the boundary between day and night......
These are just the beginning of all that he does, merely a whisper of his power. Who, then, can comprehend the thunder of his power? (Job 26:7-10,14 NLT)


With a power like this, where do I fit in?  In His perfect timing He showed me.  With every trial, every day of suffering, of pain, of wearing my knees out begging for change it has been made clear - I am to walk in discipleship with Him, only then will I be able to grasp the magnitude of what our relationship means.  Only then will I continue to stand amazed and in awe of everything He represents. Only then can I be a part of His plan to transform.

Just a few minutes ago I received a message from a friend requesting prayer. She told me to use my "Bat Line" that she knew was a direct line to God.  I laughed and told her she had use of that direct line 24/7 and I was given a chance to witness.    - I stood amazed in God's timing of that message.

Several months ago one of the OBS leaders had a participant in her group that had a husband in ICU in my hometown. He was not expected to live.  I took a care basket to her from the Online Bible Studies team.  She asked me to go back and pray over her husband - WHO ME?  - and I did. I stood amazed. He used me.

A little over a year ago God placed a crack addict on my heart. She had a disabled son and had alienated most every friend or connection she had.  I invested a year in their lives and today she walks clean with her son, renting her house, paying her bills, driving a car with license and insurance, and holding a job.  This friend is a 20+ year crack addict - this is nothing I can begin to take credit for. This is all God with a little on-the-ground facilitation to manage logistics.  #Amazed

Every time God uses me as His hands and feet in a situation I am fascinated, I stand in awe, I am amazed.  Who am I to do this work?  How can I possibly be worthy enough?  It's only been 5 years since we established this relationship, I don't have the knowledge for this.Then I remember, I am His bride
.
In our online bible study chapter this week, You Never Know How God Will Use You Until You Let Him, from the book, What Happens When Women Say Yes to God by Lysa TerKeurst,  Lysa writes:

'When we accept Jesus Christ as Lord of our life, we exchange our worthless sin for immeasurable worth of righteousness' she goes on to say 'A person pursuing obedience (in Christ) is able to pause and touch those that He says need our time......the radically obedient woman realizes she is righteous and will find God's best when she pursues right choices that bring glory to him' 

He calls us to be missionaries, to spread the Good News.  To be disciples.  To pursue Him in all things means serving Him by serving His people.   Someone said, He doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. 

Lysa ends this chapter by saying, '..you never know how God will use you, until you let Him'.

Are you letting Him use you today?  If not, #SayYes and begin living a radically obedient life - making sure you don't miss that call, or that chance to step out in faith, to do His work and be His vessel - so  you too can stand #Amazed and be #Blessed as you watch Him work - being a part of multiplying His kingdom. 

Here I am Father, Send me.  (Isaiah 6:8)

Until Next Time
In God's Holy Light, 

<3 Kelley

The "God" Filter ~ It's in the D's!

                                                               Powerful D's!

Desire, Discipline, Discernment, Direction and Delight ~ in Reading "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God, Lysa TerKeurst shares this personal filter that she uses in her relationship and talks with God. I fell in love with it immediately! There's something awesome about these 'D's!

In my weight loss journey an awesome training mentor taught me 'Dedication, Discipline, and Determination'. More D's!  There's a powerful trend going on here. I'm excited and anxious to expand my D's to not only those things that have applied to my personal perseverance through circumstances and tough goals to now growing deeper in my relationship with Jesus Christ.

After many years of believing in and knowing Jesus, I now KNOW  Him.  I remember the day as I sat in a new church for the first time.  It was a make-shift church in a borrowed building full of folding chairs and tear down walls.  There wasn't anything audible from God but I sure  was feeling different.  I knew immediately I was home, or as close as I would get while on this earth.  I'm not sure what the message was that this very different pastor was giving that day, but he was speaking it from a place of passion.  He wasn't your traditional pastor (remember this wasn't your traditional church) - he stood up front in jeans and a button down, maybe even flip flops, and was real. I realized I would need a journal for sermon notes because he was giving me more than I could possibly absorb - scary part was, I wanted more and still do.  This is how it all started not quite 5 years ago.

This same pastor over the past 5 years continues to be a major vessel in my growth. He continues to be real. Do I agree with every decision he makes within our church, absolutely not.  In fact, I think he some times has tunnel vision and I pray that his advisory team stands up to him and broadens his box. There are a few times I have felt like I didn't have the support of my church, where my heart was slightly jarred as a result. I could present my case to them but why - so I could feel recognized? I had to use my 'filter' to determine what I was looking for, who would get the glory in the situation, most times I realized it was ME. Then I remember, he is human.  He lives in the flesh.  He is still growing and learning like me.  He is a gifted disciple, but has to be spiritually fed by mentors and must continue to look for discernment every day as well.  Yes, Pastor was his official call around the church, but more than that he was a mentor, a teacher, and a wise friend. He had seminary knowledge, knew the bible, but was continuing his growth every day the same way each one of us do. He too had to discern and get his direction from above.

In describing my pastor above, I've also described Lysa.  Lysa is a gifted disciple who had a call to women's ministry and wants nothing more than multiplying the kingdom.  It is her personal wisdom that helps each of us grow with her so we too can work to multiply the kingdom. Here is her filter (and now mine). What does yours look like?

Desire - to want God more than anything else
Discipline - to make my relationship with Him my #1 Priority
Discernment - to know the difference between my own thoughts and God's voice.
Direction - to reach out to Him for clear direction in all things
Delight - may my relationship with God be characterized by sheer delight rather then a sense of duty

and to take this a step further, my old - but new 3 D's!

Dedication - to ministry. To multiplying the kingdom by building disciples. One disciple at a time!
Discipline- to become the best I can be physically and spiritually for Him. Taking care of my Temple!
Determination - to keep on keeping on regardless of the circumstances.

Filters to live by.   His will over mine ~ in all things ~ all the time.

My pastor, described above, shared his wisdom with me regarding discernment. This can be found on our church website (Link below) and is worthy of sharing.  You will find it a combination of Lysa's personal filter, his filter, and the filter of another wise author.  How awesome to have these incredible teachers in our lives.  Praising God for Proverbs 31 Ministry and my ability to grow as well as participate in an organization that is working to grow disciples across the USA and now 120+ countries.  There's something to say about social media ministry! How else can you reach so many women without leaving your office?

and just for the record, I still have that same non-traditional pastor - we now meet in a high school auditorium instead of the make-shift church (our first goal for funds is mission work, our belief - it's not the building that makes the church - its' the people.  A building would bring us comfort and beauty as we worship, feel-good stuff for us.  Is that the best use of our funds?)  He remains passionate and sometimes still thinks-in-the-box but he has been full of incredible wise messages over the last 5 years and like you and me, he is still growing.  Every day as a disciple means growing in Him, our Father.  One of the perks of  heaven on earth!

Get ready for Chapter 3 - When Obedience Becomes Radical!   Loving radical obedience!

Join us over at Proverbs 31!     

Until next time!
Basking in His Presence,
<3 Kelley 

Link to Checklist for Knowing God's Will - The River Church/Camden, SC


http://storage.cloversites.com/theriverchurch1/documents/Checklist%20for%20Knowing%20Gods%20Will.pdf